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Monday, January 20, 2014

A very meaningless Monday morning rant

Did anyone ever see 'PORTICO' NEWS?

I hate it. Despise it.. loathe it.

My wife and I bought a new TV and, while exploring, came across the app for Portico news. It was awful. Fake background, fake newscasters.. nothing real. It was so bad.

There is nothing 'real' about Portico news. The over made up and trendy dresses 'newscasters' stand in front of a green screen.  They tell us they will give us news, encapsulating all the most important things in a nutshell for us in just 20 minutes. I could not even put up with 20 seconds of it! It was so awful.. It was as of
It actually began to make my physically sick.

I was desperately trying to TURN OFF the Portico News feed but the television remote stopped working.. I felt trapped and hopeless.

The Portico song kept playing over and over again, mocking me.. it felt like a harpoon of awful things directly into my heart.. Watching Portico news for the 25 seconds I did, I think my IQ actually dropped about 10 points.

I don't think I have ever come across an app that made me physically nauseous.. If why wife would not have commandeered the remote and quickly turned the whole system 'off' I may have actually vomited all over the new smart TV. It was just that bad..

There is nothing good about PORTICO NEWS.

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