Jesus had a wife? Flight 370 never crashed? Prostitute grows male organ after being attacked by the devil? THIS is why we’re here.

There’s just too much in the world to ignore. Ignorance may be bliss, but when did you ever meet someone truly blissful?
Prepare yourself. Strap in. Tune in. Drop out.
The good, the bad, and the ugly. News of the world from the heartland of the US of A to the heartbreak of the universe..
Here’s what we know .. and what you should, too:

There is fear over a Washington style landslide in Wyoming (just South of Yellowstone no less) .. Jackson Wyoming Council has declared a state of emergency and adopted a disaster declaration due to concerns that a hill could collapse into the city.. According to an incident command official: The ground is moving, not on the surface, but 40  to 50 feet down.. And don’t forget this: Yellowstone is still a little shaky, as the HORROR REPORT reported yesterday..

Some weird booms and noises were heard along the West Coast, sparking fears of a quake. Experts are now saying, though, that the mysterious rumbling in Orange County California was not a quake.  Instead it was a supersonic Navy flight.. They say. But what is unsaid: There is a huge amount of fear right now in California that a long overdue quake can happen soon..

Mystery explosions and loud bangs in the UK..

H7N9 bird flu can pass between mammals, researchers find
The deadly H5N1 bird flu needs just 5 mutations to spread easily to humans.. 

NASA photo
Lots of sources, including the HORROR REPORT, were amazed and curious over that strange light on Mars caught on an image by a rover.. an anomaly? A lens flare? An underground civilization lighting a camp fire? The endless treasure trove of conspiracy theories have flourished online. But now NASA is weighing in with a scientific possibility: It’s light reflecting off of the sun. Mars rumors always take me back to 2012 when I first saw this video of real “life on Mars.”

A girlfriend of a passenger, Sarah Bajc, on board the missing Flight 370 believes that the passengers are still alive..  The video was from about 5 days back on CNN.. it’s compelling. There’s a newer video: Bacj continues to say that she believes Flight 370 was taken.. Bacj says the families still have the general perception that this plane did not crash. Either it’s dramatically awful sadness and grief, and an unrealistic false positive view about  the death of 200+ passengers.. or this: The reason why a plane or wreckage or pings have not been found is because there is nothing to find.. Nothing crashed. We also know this: No major breakthroughs at this time in the search.. And those pings??? Get this: We are being told in newest reports that the signals being picked up are not related to the missing flight 370.. So… what are those pings from then? But at the same time there are news reports saying the latest pings have nothing to do with the missing plane, we have this: Australia’s Prime Minister is ‘confident’ that the signals are from the black box! If you’re not confused yet, you should be.. from the minutes after the flight ‘vanished’ until now, the stories have changed and almost 0% of what governments in Asia revealed was true.. even the last words of the pilot were not what we were originally told. I still distinctly recall those stories immediately after from FAMILIES (not governments) that cell phones of the presumed dead were still ringing and some were still showing up on Chinese social networks..

There may be another problem in the search: Another cyclone..

The strongest storm right now on Earth: ITA. It’s a cyclone and it’s ravaging parts of Queensland down under.. The storm is being called ‘beastly‘  It is expected to make landfall as a category 4 storm.. ITA is dangerous and the strongest tropical system on the planet earth so far in 2014..

Zombie satellite: Europe’s Sentinel-1A spacecraft nearly smashed into a dead NASA satellite yesterday..

Ghost hunters have descended no a hotel in New Jersey to hunt a serial foot fetish enthused ghost.. According to Jersey papers, the Hotel Somerset has a ghostly culprit messing with shoes and tickling the feet of residents..  One of the people complaining about the spirit with the weird habits is a 67-year-old Vietnam vet who suffers from PTSD..

People speeding in Missouri are about to have a sound cannon blast through their windshield.. (not an ONION article) .. The Missouri Department of Transportation is unveiling two LRAD sound cannons which will reportedly start by targeting those who speed in construction zones.  KMBC NEWS says it’s an ‘attention gabbing way’ to get drivers to slow down (and maybe scare the hell out of a few who think an alien will be landing on roof of the car..

Albert Einsteen feared that technology would create a generation of idiots. Are we there yet?

John B. Wells is offering a plea to listeners on his Youtube page: Stop supporting YOUTUBE pirate streams of his radio program CARAVAN TO MIDNIGHT..  Wells called piraters “dark forces” and continued to ask listeners to pay $5 a month to subscribe to his online radio program.. On another post, Wells said that CARAVAN TO MIDNIGHT will begin to attempt legal action against those posting programs.. As of now: There are numerous Wells programs still available in their entirety on Youtube..

Big stores are closing.. McDonalds and Walmart profits down.. and now this: FAMILY DOLLAR (a dollar store) is closing 300 locations.. the economic rebound sure is strong..

More college students are battling hunger as costs rise and tuition increases.. Are we heading for that breaking point yet? The next bubble slowly bursting: School loans and the train wreck of debt that has become of the American student.

This story offered up for your own investigation and discernment (but it’s chilling if you think of the consequences of traveling down this road) .. remember after Sandy Hook when an anonymous person donated 26 Christmas trees, after the massacre and children were shot? …after? Footage from the school actually appears to show 26 Christmas trees wrapped and ready during the actual day’s events… There has been debate on several conspiracy minded sites about this for months..  Where do you stand..?

This could be a bit of a game changer: A papyrus referring to Jesus’ wife is likely ancient–more like ancient than it being a fake..  The son of man a mover and shaker? This tiny piece of ancient Scripture contained “My wife she will be able to be my disciple.” Stop the presses … stop the presses. Word to the Vatican: You can’t hide it all!


Rosemary's Baby
The creepy looking ROSEMARY’S BABY will air on NBC May 11th and May 15th at 9pm..

Miley Cyrus, Instagram
Miley.. please keep your clothes on!

Man impaled ‘in his buttocks’ during filming of Guillermo del Toro’s horror flick HAUNTED PEEK..

Karen Gillan BrentThwaites 'Oculus.' | Relativity Media
Praise for OCULUS:  A ‘carefully paced” great thriller..

I used to think these things happened only in crazy Romania: Brenda Kadere was a prostitute working the streets of South Africa.. she has now come forward to explain that her obvious questionable career choices earned her a penis.. by actually growing one! She claims. She also said it was the worst of the beast.. the devil himself attacked her by causing the male sex organ to grow on her private parts.. According to her hellish account, the organ grew to a point where she had to seek the help of anointing oil. Eventually, Kadere says, the organ “burst out” in a discharge.. She thanks God for the power to remove the penis.  Without it, though, I feel she’s missing out on a large audience that would sure enjoy the best of both worlds.. The devil made her grow it, though..

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